south carolina.

I haven't really been keeping up with my blogging but that's okay. Here is the 411:


-Moved to South Carolina.
-Didn't get accepted into school.
-GED is an option.
-Got a boyfriend.
-Staying with Aunt until mid March.
-Birthday is in 10 days.
-Made a few new friends.
-Deciding I'm not involving my old life with my new one.
-A lot of drama and a lot of fun.
-Amber comes down in July, out on our own prob by Dec or Jan.


That's all for now.
Not much is going on.
OH!
Cell phone.

(:


Laterrrr.

lmao.

give me sympathy because all i want is attention.


in all honesty, i don't give a fuck.



GOODBYE ALTOONA.
FOREVER AND EVERY ASSHOLE IN IT.
(:

I considered you a close friend;

You show nothing of it, Kylie. I mean, we went through so much, but it's okay, I wasn't expecting the fact that you didn't care I was leaving the state and never coming back. It's okay that you're never online to talk to me. It's okay that you think I was avoiding you when you know I had work and I was packing and shit, and don't even say I was avoiding you because I was the only one putting effort into talking to you because I care about you, but it looks like that's only one way. You obviously don't care about me. This is not causing drama, well I don't see how it is, I see it's just a person venting about her feelings because you don't ever fucking want to her it. I thought we were close friends and always going to be friends, but I guess I was wrong. It's pathetic. I honestly wasted so much time on you. I had better things to do, but I picked you, I picked you out of all the things I could have been doing. I was offered so many things, but I choose you instead because you're one of my only friends in Altoona, but looks like I was wrong about that. Looks like we weren't even friends. And I called you a lot, and yet you ignore my phone calls. I put so much effort into talking to you, and you put shit! SHIT, KYLIE! I tried so fucking hard to make this work, and yet you were too fucking involved around the fucking internet. I mean, honestly, I thought I was bad with the internet, but that's all you fucking do. We don't have fun anymore because you're life consist of the internet and doing nothing. It's a shame that you don't even have an imagination anymore.

I'm done with bullshit. Altoona is a fucking pit of hell. The only people good in Altoona is my family, kristy, jaleesa, and fucking nichole and justin. I'm glad I'm leaving. I'll never have to fucking frown again.

im not sure what it was...

but i really miss her.
:/

and i've mad a lot of mistakes with her and she really was one of my best friends.


if you're reading this,
i'm sorry for all the things i did wrong to make you upset. i'm sorry i lied, i'm sorry i never called when i said i would, i'm sorry i could be a better best friend, i'm sorry for giving up, i'm sorry for growing distant. i miss you like crazy.
:/


please, if you're reading, contact me.

reality...

sucks asshole.

I can't do shit for my best friend because she's all the way in Ohio.
I'm losing touch with Sheepy. :/
I've lost touch with Kylee.
My mom and I are fab.


Why does everything feel like it's crashing? Oh wait, it is.

I move in 13 days and I'm getting really upset, but the decision was made a long time ago and I can't turn away now. It's happening. We don't have a lot of money to move away with, only a few hundred, but we have to move because we got kicked out because people are assholes. I don't know how I will handle all this by myself, but I guess I wont be by myself if my mom is with me.

I can't handle not having my life flash before my eyes. I haven't cried in weeks, but now...I'm finally crying.

I use to think that life had it's reasons, now I think living is a joke. I don't want to be alive anymore but because I know people will be hurt if I died, I can't do that to them. I may not liking being alive, but they do and I'm still alive for them. Life is not what it use to be, and I guess a lot of people in the world have noticed because 1 person commits suicide every 17 minutes. Life now and days is truly a joke. You live to die. What a pathetic saying. It's should be more like "When you grow older, you realize that living is pretty pointless so why not kill yourself? Only being a child is the funnest part of life."


I like to think I'm a positive thinker, but lately all I've been thinking is negative thoughts. I've gained a lot of weight, I've gotten super careless about how I look, I'm never going to be good enough for someone, I'm never going to accomplish my ideal dreams, and so forth.


Yeah, as negative as that sounds, I can not change the way I think. This is pathetic.
Anyway,. FAIL POST.

it felt so sweet.

Maria Mena. (:


Uh, not much to blog about besides the fact I dislike this lady a lot to where I think it might be hate and I stopped believing in hate awhile ago. Everyone knows I never downgrade anyone because I'm a sweetheart, but when it comes to this lady, I only speak the truth and the truth happens to be pathetic.


nik and i are talking again.<3
josh and i are talking again.
tom and i are kind of talking again.


i miss kylee
and sheep.
):


i will meet andrew in 15 days. (:

i might work down at a tj maxx in south carolina.
i'm going to miss my job.


lol, k this was a fail post.

Feb 14th

is our moving date.

goodbye altoona.

365 photos.

ruined.

i haven't taken a picture in almost a week since i left my camera at sheeps house.
oh well.
i fail at life.

update!

I've been playing xbox live again like heroin when i'm not at work. (:

I've been so much like shit because of a certain someone. I don't like being pushed into doing something I don't want to do but because I'm a stupid pushover, I do and then I feel like complete shit because it's the lowest thing to do ever. Honestly, I can't handle this pain but like, it's hard to tell that person how I feel because I'm not use to the attention this person gives me and like, I don't know, it's hard. And like, usually I'm completely honest with everyone, but I can't be honest with him about some things, it makes me sick. The way this person makes me feel is actually worse than how I felt before. I honestly want to get away from this person and that is why I'm glad I'm moving. This person makes me so sick to my stomach I don't have the heart to tell them I'm done. :/

I'm going to miss a lot of people when I move, but I'm still going to be friends with them all because they all had a part in making me who I am today. I saw Joey for the first time in months yesterday, and I sooo bad wanted to give him the biggest hug ever but freaking, he was working and I didn't want to be like "Hey Monster, give me a hug!" But next time I see him, I don't care where it is, I'm getting the biggest hug ever from him, no lie. <3

Jaleesa, I'm going to miss her more than words can explain. I still want to be sooo close when I move, but she doesn't think we will be. And I love her till death, she is one of my best friends and like, I honestly could not see my life without her anymore. Yeah, a lot of shit happened between us in the past, but that's the past not now. Jaleesa and I use to be inseparable and now we're still close but now like we use to be. I'm going to miss her soooooooo much.
:/





I GOT A KITTEN!
WOOO.
:D

This time we're keeping her.
Meet Patience aka Baby.

i haven't...

really posted about what has been going on, so here it goes.


Matt is a liar and I don't deal with liars.
Kristy and I are friends again. (:
I'm working a lot.
I'm gaining weight.
Luis and I are unofficial, again. (don't know who he is, don't worry about it. (: )
I haven't really talked to amber in awhile, i should do that.
I'm addicted to Xbox again.
I started 365 photos.
My mom and I are best friends, finally.
I move in one month.
My hair is growing in lovely. (:
I'm working a lot.
I'm sleeping less.
I'm addicted to Maria Mena.
I'm spoiling my mom and brother with materialistic things.
I've matured to a level I am unsure of.


Yeah.
(:


kay, ima go listen to Maria Mena and upload pictures to flickr.

goodbye 2008, hello 2009

(:


new years resolutions:

- get to south carolina.
- get GED
- meet amber
- meet kylee
- 365 photos [i'll have link for that soon]
- Forgive and Forget.
- Laugh when it's not needed.
- Be overall a new happy person. (:






moo.